She starts off with the intention of teaching herself how to be an adequate person to be with, gives up, and ends up teaching herself how to live alone.
Stupid people....making me feel stupid
I feel really ashamed
What happened to me? I had become so sure of myself before.
How foolish was I...........................................................
Now I feel like the biggest goddamn fool in the world.
A worthless piece of scum. I want to crawl into a cave and die.
I am a newborn child again, back to square one..
hell even lower than square one...
insecurities, blunders, mutilation...
I am crucifying myself with shame
I feel so much of it, that ANY pride or dignity I've EVER had vanishes from my memories
SUCH a fucken loser
Everything is SO fucked that if I were to feel the full-fledged fuckage-ness of it all I'd die on the spot. That's why I'm not dying or killing myself. I can't feel it all, I can't feel anything. As bad as it is, as much as my life is over, I'm not feeling it.
SUCH a fucken loser
Everything is SO fucked that if I were to feel the full-fledged fuckage-ness of it all I'd die on the spot. That's why I'm not dying or killing myself. I can't feel it all, I can't feel anything. As bad as it is, as much as my life is over, I'm not feeling it.
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