Took and bullet to the brain and I'm still fucken standin'

Maybe I lost myself, but having physical and mental evidence pertaining to that self proves that that now absent self really did exist. The evidence also brings comfort.

I remember Emily saying something like "My whole self was half connie"
That was true for me too. But I'm not dealing with that loss the same way that she is. She never completely lost herself. I feel like a new breed, so I'm not feeling as if half of me was Emily and that half of me is gone. I just feel completely confused and dreamy. I'm a new entity now so I'm not feeling the loss like she is. I'm missing her but in the sense that I'm missing myself and knowing that with myself comes compatibility and comradeship with her. So you could say I'm missing myself more than I'm missing her, but that statement is also false, because Connie herself, is included with Emily. She lost me, I lost myself which in turn made me lose her.

I miss her incredibly, but when I think about my friendship with her, I begin to miss myself more prominently than I miss her, but only because if I had myself back, I'd have her back. I miss myself more prominently than her because myself is part Emily. I lost her, but the bigger picture is that I lost myself, which includes her. Myself comes with Emily. Myself which includes Emily is not there anymore.

But, the worst part about losing myself wasn't losing myself, It was losing my best friend.